Modes of transport: 10. (train, bus, car, bicycle, moped, motorbike, tuk-tuk, horse, camel and elephant)
Longest journey: 42 hours (train from Chengdu to Lhasa)
Shortest journey: 3 minutes (rip-off Mumbai taxi driver who charged quadruple the going rate for the pleasure)
Best journey: Bullet train from Qingdao to Beijing. The future beckons.
Worst journey: Train from Beijing to Pingyao. Get me a bullet in the head.
Worst food: Chicken’s foot on Beijing to Pingyao train.
Best food: Tandoori Kingfish on the beach in Palolem, Goa.
Craziest drivers: Nepalese bus drivers, like being in the movie Speed but with extra cliffs. Closely followed by G on his 500cc Royal Enfield.
Most expensive: Tibet (£500 for a week!). Closely followed by eastern China, they’re getting rich fast.
Cheapest: India (£500 for the first month)
Friendliest people: Tibetans
Worst people: Chinese troops in Tibet
Nicest town or city: Jodhpur, Rajasthan. Truly mesmerizing.
Worst town or city: Aurangabad, Karnataka. Truly, mesmerizingly awful.
Most disappointing scenery: Kerala backwaters. “The highlight of India.” Really?
Most amazing scenery: Hampi boulders? Annapurna high-pass? Gobi desert near Dun Huang? Tibet? Don’t know.
Number of times Spinks defecated himself (all through sickness I may add): 4
Number of times G crashed or fell off something: 2 (horse, motorbike)
Number of times we fell in love (not with each other): Too many.