“Wizards of Suzhou…Wizards of Suzhou…” A haunting lament as Magnus Pole called it, especially when you sing it to the tune of ‘Hallelujah’ and in tone of Jeff Buckley. So American Matt and I fired through to Suzhou for a wizard-based day of drinking to kind of celebrate both our respective birthdays. Magnus Pole was a wondrous host. We had a remote-controlled car race (I lost), a duel on some giant concrete balls (I lost) and some beautiful impromptu singing sessions with the locals (everyone won). The aim of the game was to build a wizarding staff with the completed cans of beer taped end-to-end as you go. The wizard with the longest staff could command much wizard-based respect and honour, while the wizard with the stumpiest staff (inevitably me) was scorned and mocked. I had to wear a ladies wicker hat for the whole day and after dropping my staff was named ‘Thurlow the Clumsy.’ All in all, one of the geekiest and greatest days I’ve had in China.